Episode 57: Holiday Traditions…Only 2 Gifts for Christmas?!
What You’ll Learn
Friend & Family Gifts (01:48)
Teacher Gifts (08:10)
Random Acts of Kindness (10:25)
Mailmen & Waste Management Workers (11:25)
Extended Family Gift Giving (11:55)
Gifts for Our Kids (14:15)
Stockings (25:00)
Recap (31:00)
Invitation (32:15)
WARNING…for the mommas listening, there is sensitive information in today’s podcast that is meant for mom’s ears only, grab some earbuds, take it off the speaker, and keep listening.
The holidays with kids are both incredibly beautiful and overwhelmingly full of challenges, like organizing all the people, planning meals, packing for trips or preparing for guests, not to mention all the gifts & MORE! This week we want to give you a peek behind the curtain, and tell you ALL about the holidays and traditions we celebrate in our homes. BUT, as you listen remember…we’re sharing ideas, customs, and traditions from over the years and how they’ve been shaped in the different seasons of motherhood. Your seasons will change, your capacity will change, and you still have plenty of time to try-on traditions to see what fits your family best. Get the MOST out of this episode when you click here and we’ll send you the 2022 Deliberate Day Holiday Planner AND get you on the list!
Friend & Family Gifts (01:48)
Let’s get real…it’s ok to not give gifts to EVERYONE this year, or really any year! You just need to communicate!
One of the most beautiful things that Britt & Brandon have done is to simplify the gift aspect of various holidays and bring about the traditions, customs, beauty, and richness that is there present within the holiday when you strip away the outpouring of tons of gifts (and it become a big distraction).
You have to buy gifts, which costs money.
You have to keep track of them, which requires memory.
Yes, we love giving gifts, but it’s not what the holidays are really about.
There is a lot of obligatory giving that happens. This year, why not DSD (do something different-like Amy Porterfield says). Let’s meet for a meal together, build community and memories instead of just exchanging gifts!
So many budgets are hurting this year, so we need to communicate in honesty.
Let’s talk grandparents too! We know they are giving out of love and generosity, but too much generosity can be overwhelming for mommas and kiddos. Maybe this year if you catch them before they buy, you can encourage a gift of something the kids need, or just a gift of time or an experience.
All kids really want from their grandparents is their time! Instead of a gift, why not an ice cream date, or a lunch and library date? You need to be honest about your space and capacity!
Britt’s parents do more giving what kids need, rather than gifts (for her grandkids) which is amazing!
For Christmas, Britt’s mom gives her kids a delicious meal and the kids give her their time on Christmas Day!
Teacher Gifts (08:10)
Teachers are amazing! We love them and they do SO much for our kids throughout the year, so we really should give them gifts. Britt thought this through, and decided that a night off of cooking would be a welcome treat! So each year, she would bring one hot casserole for lunch (for all the staff to enjoy right away), as well as an individual pan for each teacher. If you can’t do a casserole, consider a gift card! Teachers love sentimental gifts, but the sheer number can become overwhelming (20+ students can add up quick).
Random Acts of Kindness (10:25)
Britt & I like to find mommas in grocery stores and give them a gift card for the store we’re in, or for a coffee. We look for moms who seem like they could use a pick-me-up and try to give them a little encouragement. This is one of our favorite ways to give!
Mailmen & Waste Management Workers (11:25)
Britt’s family does scones for the Mailman and Waste Management workers, and it seems to be a hit!
Extended Family Gift Giving(11:55)
For a while, Britt’s did a 1:1 gift exchange and it got a bit too big (as the families have grown). Then, they simplified it by cutting the grandkids out (they get plenty anyways). Now, they adopt a family (everyone gets another family and does a whole family gift). Gifts have included a trip to The Track (a local arcade), a home movie theater kit (with candy, popcorn, and a movie), and other gifts that help create memories.
Gifts for Our Kids (14:15)
As we all continue to add to our families, the stuff just multiplies inside our homes. Britt’s family has 9 people in 1,800 square feet and for the most part, it’s perfect for them. It forces them to be honest about what stuff they really need.
First, they cut Christmas gifts to want, need, wear, read. It was ok, but the gifts still piled up.
Their family REALLY values travel, experiences and memories. Three to four times (so far), they’ve saved up and instead of presents, they’ve gone to a cabin for Christmas.
Around 7 years ago, Britt’s family went to a cabin for the first time. She was really worried because her kids were young and she wanted them to have ALL the gifts. Much to everyone’s (pleasant) surprise, the kids opened their one gift each and they were so thrilled with what they got.
Our family came to the same conclusion of less, but because I got tired of watching my kids open and toss without any appreciation. They weren’t even enjoying anything before they opened the next package.
Now, in Britt’s family, if they do a vacation or a trip, they only do stockings. If they’re at home, they do two gifts (one small gift from Santa, and one bigger gift from Britt & Brandon), and stockings. The bigger gift will be something that they’ve been wanting, that encourages their hobbies, independence, growth, and learning. Britt watches sales throughout the whole year and shops smart—getting things that have lasting value. Her son wants a wood lathe this year and her daughter got a camera last year.
Britt’s kids get one small gift from Saint Nicholas (Santa) because of the experience she had as a child. One of her cousins was very blessed each Christmas, and it was hard for Britt to see as a child why Santa (who could give anything) didn’t give her family that many gifts.
Now, Britt & Brandon have explained to the kids that whey’ve spoken with Santa and asked him not to bring more than one gift (this helps when others get more gifts).
My kids are in the stage now where I have to keep them from telling other kids about Santa.
At my house, we also do two gifts and stockings. Santa brings one gift and Kev & I bring one gift, and the kids pick them. I’ve already had children tell me they will not be continuing this tradition—but time will tell.
Stockings (25:00)
Britt’s sticking game is EPIC! She even asked her kids which part of their Christmas gifts was their favorite, and they said the stockings! She budgets $50 per kid, and fills each stocking FULL of hand-picked items for each kiddo (specifically). In the past, she’s done snacks, trinkets, nail polish, journals, and so many more! They even wrap each little git individually! (If you want to up-level your stocking game, click here for the Holiday Planner—which has a full page of ideas for your stockings!).
If you do plan to up-level your stockings and need a little help organizing what you get, try what Britt does! She keeps a list in the notes app on her phone for each kid (photos included) of what she’s bought. Then she puts the items in a Walmart bag with each kiddo’s name stapled on it, and stores the bags in a box on the top of a book shelf in her room. Whenever she adds new stuff, she’ll take the bags down, lay it all out on her bed, snap and replace the photo …bam! Organized and done. (Britt also has a version of this for Easter and birthdays).
Recap(31:00)
When you’re considering charitable giving this year, consider where you have the capacity to have the biggest impact, and then let go of the rest.
The act of generosity is so beautiful, but it isn’t free from abuse, meaning, more gifts isn’t always better!
Less allows us to appreciate what’s been given (this goes for our kids and for us).
Being well organized for the holidays can make it so much more peaceful, keeping a gift log and simplifying can make a huge difference!
Invitation (32:15)
Go get our free holiday planner, made specifically with mommas in mind, it is filled with resources to help YOU plan the holidays this year (and stop letting the holidays plan you).
Here are a few of the pages you'll find inside:
Gifts & Giving
Wishlist (it’s a keepsake)
Stocking Stuffer Idea List
You can find the link to get the Holiday Planner EVERYWHERE! It’s at www.thedeliberateday.org, send us a DM, e-mail at Brittany@thedeliberateday.org, and it’s right here (below) in the podcast notes!!
Finally, hop on Instagram and share a holiday tradition with us that we can share with the mommas in our community! We love hearing from you, and mommas learning from mommas is SO important, it builds community AND it enriches our lives!
